P.A.D. Yourself to Get Clear on What You Want
My post on 04/03 tackled getting into alignment at work and it was a doozie! Many of you had requests to go a bit deeper into the content, so I will break it in pieces and share a bit more about each of the "7 Ways to Get Alignment at Work" (and in life!). This is an expansion of tip #3: Consider What You Want.
We’ve become a society under water with ideas, inspiration and a LOT of influence coming in hot from all angles. So, in a world with so much access and information, it’s even more important for us to slow down and consider what WE want. I’ve found three things help me in getting, and staying, clear on what I want.
Definition: steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success.
Many things we do in life are tough. In fact, I think some of the best things are the toughest. Following your heart. Raising babies. Walking away from a relationship or role that isn’t healthy for you. Fighting our way through anxiety, depression, addiction to get back to who we really are. Functioning as a human.
“Effort is grossly underrated.”
– Gary Vaynerchuk
When things are tough, it doesn’t mean we should walk away right away. We should pay close attention to why it’s tough and if the challenge is fulfilling or draining for us. A few questions to ponder:
What is fulfilling about this work/relationship?
How can I adjust my behavior, attitude or approach to make this less tough?
How long have I been at this and how many different strategies have I worked with to improve the situation?
Review your answers as if they were one of your dear friends thoughts. If you read their comments, what words of advice would you have for them? Persevere or pause?
Definition: of undisputed origin; genuine.
I’ve watched people in a variety of jobs, levels all the way up and down an organization. And people are hurting. They are losing small and large portions of themselves every day, on big and small scale. I wish there was one thing to blame for it, but it’s really the simple mashup of messy, imperfect humans + messy, imperfect organizations. Both parties are trying their best, but it’s tough.
In a world where no one really has it all figured out, what would it cost you to get reacquainted with who you really are? Then, practice sharing that with individuals and the world in new and shiny ways. 2 ways to get more authentic:
Get Quiet. Really spend time alone, journalling, meditating/praying, hiking, exercising – whatever you need to do to distance yourself from what everyone else thinks you should be.
Use Tools. There are amazing books and resources out there that can help you craft your story of who you really are and how that needs to translate and be shared differently than it has been. A few of my faves:
Let Your Life Speak by Parker Palmer (life-changing book for me)
Soul Coaching by Denise Linn (28-days to discover your authentic self)
StrengthsFinder 2.0 by Tom Rath (comes with an access code to take the SF assessment; I typically start my coaching client’s here before moving into coaching sessions and deeper work)
Definition: the faculty of discerning; discrimination; acuteness of judgment and understanding.
This is a skill that develops over time. To me, it’s about listening to your “gut.” Some pray and listen to God’s guidance, some commune with nature and listen for that quiet voice inside. None of its wrong if it helps you get clear.
I’ve got feelings about the word “judgment” as you may know. In fact, it’s probably a trigger for most. Judging others and being judged takes up a large part of our day whether we acknowledge it or not.
Instead of judging your thoughts, feelings in actions, use the “acuteness of judgement” to trust that you have the answers. And through thoughtful investigation, or discernment, you will be even more aligned with what’s next.
Stay true to yourself on your journey!
Peace and Progress,